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Is it possible to have a great relationship and a great career? Do you truly believe you can have both? The answer to that question should get you thinking about what having it all means to you.
Everyone's definition is different. We know that everyone has dreams that they might not share with anyone. We did, and they were mostly about having it all. We wanted the white picket fence and everything else that we had dreamed of.
Perhaps you didn't share your secrets with anyone because you were afraid of the response, "you can't have it all".
In fact, this one statement that held Kim back for a long time. "I kept thinking that there were so many great things in my life, that maybe you just don't get everything."
Take some time to think about what "everything" is for you. What is the life you want? What are you doing to create that life?
Often times, we focus on "why don't I have it yet?" This was true for both of us. We couldn't figure out why we weren't in fulfilling relationships. We both had a vision of having it all. It was similar in the fact that we both wanted great relationships with men who supported and encouraged us and believed in us.
We both wanted to achieve excellence in our professional life and we wanted to be passionate about what we did. We wanted that elusive work-life balance we all talked about. We also wanted to serve others and have meaningful relationships.
There were things that were standing in our way and we needed to make room in our lives to have both the man of our dreams and the dream career. We needed to let go of any limiting beliefs we had about having it all and finding Mr. Right.
It also was about eliminating things in our professional life that weren't working. Sometimes we were forced to think about the people in our lives. We had to consider if each person in our lives fit into this phase of our journey of having it all. Had we outgrown them? Were they part of our picture of our dream life?
We embraced all possibilities and let go of obstacles that were in our way. Sometimes the decisions were hard to make. What helped us was that we had a clear vision of our definition of having it all. All of our decisions were based on the question: "Does this match with my vision?"
We set our intention to have it all, and then we focused on how it would feel to achieve our goal. We thought about what aspects we were grateful for, and then we thought about what inspired actions we could take to help us have it all.
What having it all really means is up to you. We are certain about this. We all have a different picture of what this means for us. Take some time and reflect. Ask yourself: in your perfect world what would it look like? It is okay to dream again. Nothing is impossible if you believe it can happen for you. Work on staying away from negative feelings that might pop up like, "there is no way could this happen for me". If there are obstacles in your way, think about one thing you could do each day to make a change.
"Having It All" is going to take effort on your part. Chances are, you are going to find you will need to step out of your comfort zone from time to time. During those times, when you are feeling a bit like quitting on your quest, remember your vision, know that it is possible, and be confident that it can happen for you. You deserve it.
"It's Your Time to Have It All!"
