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People go through life wearing blinders that allow them to see only a small piece of the total picture. Everyone has a unique view that leads to their own interpretation of events.Â
Sometimes, after living 50, 60, 70 years or more wearing blinders, you get pretty set in your ways. Actually, you get pretty set in your ways in your teens and early twenties. Â
I can tell you from personal experience-sometimes you just really want to feel angry. Or, you just really want to feel hurt-and say, it's something somebody did to you and you blame them for how you feel. You just want to stick with and wallow in those feelings.Â
At one point I decided that I didn't like the way I felt when I felt angry. I felt really cruddy. I felt my energy pouring out of me. Same thing with feeling hurt. I'd be slouched over not really getting in good oxygen-and feeling downright yucky. Â
Now I won't let that go on for more than five minutes because I recognize-it is not helping me! Feeling angry in no way, shape or form moves me forward in my life. I decided I no longer want to or need to feel angry, hurt and yucky. It wastes my time. It wastes my energy. And it is not doing good things for my immune system either.
Gee whiz! You know, if you feel angry with Sam, does Sam care? Does your anger bother him? Does Sam even know? Does he have any inkling, that you are angry with him? Probably not.Â
So, who do you hurt when you hold anger or a grudge, hurt or sadness inside? You only hurt yourself.Â
One more thing... To let go of anger or hurt-simply let go! Did you see the original movie Star Wars? Do you remember when Yoda told Luke, "There is do and do not. There is no try." So you can't even try really, really, really hard to let go. You just let go.
I challenge you to just finish your need to experience anger, hurt or sadness the next time you interpret an event in a way that causes you to dive into those emotions. Feel the feelings and then just let them go. Â
Or, better yet, take a look at your reaction and ask yourself why you reacted that way. Maybe the next time those same circumstances arise, you will be free of the need to suffer. You can create that your new reality-when you choose to do so.Â
If you need help letting go, let me know.
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